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Feeling cheeky and want to add a bit of sarcasm to your Instagram feed? Perfect! A clever, sarcastic caption can make your posts stand out and give your followers a good laugh.
Whether you’re poking fun at yourself, commenting on life, or just throwing some shade, these 100 sarcastic Instagram captions are sure to add the perfect amount of sass to your photos.
100 Sarcastic Instagram Captions
“Oh, you’re an expert? Please, continue.”
“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
“My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch.”
“I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
“Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.”
“I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”
“Sure, I do marathons. On Netflix.”
“If only common sense were more common.”
“Who needs self-awareness when I can blame others?”
“My bed is a magical place. I suddenly remember everything I had to do.”
“Why chase your dreams when you can nap?”
“Me? Sarcastic? Never.”
“I don’t need a hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.”
“I’m not lazy. I’m on energy-saving mode.”
“I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?”
“I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.”
“I love work. I could watch it all day.”
“I put the ‘pro’ in procrastinate.”
“I’m not always sarcastic. Sometimes I’m sleeping.”
“I’m multi-talented: I can talk and annoy you at the same time.”
“Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity.”
“You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.”
“If you’re waiting for me to care, you better pack a lunch. It’s going to be a while.”
“I don’t need anger management. You just need to stop making me angry.”
“I’m sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?”
“If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel.”
“I’d like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me.”
“If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.”
“I’m not always late. Sometimes I don’t show up at all.”
“I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.”
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.”
“I don’t have the energy to pretend I like you today.”
“I’m not insulting you. I’m describing you.”
“Yes, I know I’m on fire. Stop staring and put me out.”
“It’s a beautiful day to leave me alone.”
“I’m not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.”
“I’m smiling. That alone should scare you.”
“If I wanted to hear from an idiot, I’d call you.”
“I can’t decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 shots of vodka, or 2 weeks of sleep.”
“I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.”
“My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where even I don’t know if I’m kidding or not.”
“Do I look like I care?”
“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.”
“I’m sorry, what language are you speaking? It sounds like nonsense.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I’m just selective about who I acknowledge.”
“It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.”
“If I had a dollar for every smart thing you say, I’d be poor.”
“Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.”
“If I wanted your opinion, I’d give it to you.”
“I’m not a morning person, or a night owl. I’m just a permanently exhausted pigeon.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?”
“I’m not rude. I’m honest.”
“Don’t give me that look, or I’ll give it back to you.”
“I’m not lazy. I’m just highly motivated to do nothing.”
“Sarcasm: because beating up people is illegal.”
“I’m not anti-social. I’m selectively social.”
“I’d explain it to you, but I left my crayons at home.”
“I’m not weird. I’m limited edition.”
“If you ran like your mouth, you’d be in great shape.”
“I’m not arguing. I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
“You can’t Photoshop personality.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I’m just prioritizing my problems.”
“My life feels like a test I didn’t study for.”
“I’m not bitter. I’m just unsweetened.”
“I don’t have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.”
“I’m not shy. I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.”
“Sure, I’d love to help you out… now, which way did you come in?”
“If you find me offensive, then I suggest you quit finding me.”
“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.”
“I’m not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.”
“I’m not a control freak, but you’re doing it wrong.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I’m just on my phone.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.”
“I’m not bossy. I just have better ideas.”
“I’m not always sarcastic. Sometimes I’m asleep.”
“I’m not lazy. I’m just in energy-saving mode.”
“If you don’t like my attitude, quit talking to me.”
“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just mean with style.”
“I’m not shy. I’m just good at figuring out who’s worth talking to.”
“I’m not lazy. I’m just on power-saving mode.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I’m just giving you time to reflect on what an idiot you’re being.”
“I’m not a people person.”
“I’m not bossy. I’m just aggressively helpful.”
“If you can’t laugh at yourself, I’ll be happy to do it for you.”
“I’m not short. I’m concentrated awesome.”
“If I was meant to be controlled, I would have come with a remote.”
“I’m not antisocial. I’m pro-solitude.”
“I’m not rude. I’m just brutally honest.”
“I’m not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone.”
“I’m not crazy. My reality is just different than yours.”
“I’m not shy. I’m just plotting my next move.”
“I’m not rude. I’m just selectively polite.”
“I’m not weird. I’m just more creative than you.”
“I’m not short. I’m fun-sized.”
“I’m not always sarcastic. Sometimes I’m sleeping.”
“I’m not lazy. I’m on energy-saving mode.”
“If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a stupid question.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I’m just prioritizing my sanity.”
“I’m not bossy. I just have leadership skills.”
“I’m not arguing. I’m just passionately explaining why I’m right.”
Final Thoughts
Injecting a bit of sarcasm into your Instagram captions can make your posts stand out and give your followers a good laugh. These 100 sarcastic Instagram captions are perfect for adding a touch of humor and wit to your photos.
Whether you’re poking fun at yourself or making a cheeky comment on life, these captions are sure to resonate with your audience. So go ahead, embrace your inner sass, and let your sarcasm shine through!
